If choice I had

If choice I had,

I swear I wouldn't be here 

If choice was real,

We'd be exactly where we were before

...cold, lonely; passion free 

If choice I had,

I wouldn't give now all of me 

Knowing full well it serves another 

If choice I had,

I'd lock and hide my soul now 

Knowing full well, it serves me no longer...

Gates

I am not lost nor am I found

I open up this wound of mine

For more beloved torture

For I can't shut these gates

These wondrous gates

now open to my soul

For you to love or mar

As you may take such fancy

They're open, passage is clear 

A standing invitation, banquet halls 

Song and dance, all just for you

To walk inside I hope with love

Yet you may come with weapons 

Your full artillery, to maim to injure

All the same...the gates are open,

You alone hold the eternal keys.

The force

I wish I could just walk away

I wish it daily now

I wish my soul could just endure;

The ripping of this force.

I crave our closeness now;

With every second 

and second in between

My thoughts are captive to you

Breath in; the air without you

Is Un-nurturing, unkind.

Breath out; the pain sets in,

Unnatural, debilitating ache.

I tried to force myself to go

All say it's better that way.

Dear god, my feet won't carry me!

Souls intertwined dictate,

...bodies and hearts obey.